Olympus Weekly Web
by Katie Cruz-Williams
Summary: What'a going on in Olympus? how do the gods know that Percy was claimed? Do Apollo and Aphrodite REALLY have a fling? all from the top of my head! so don't judge too harshly!
1. Issue 1

**.com (AN: oww stands for ****O****lympus ****Wi****de ****W****eb)**

**SON OF POSEIDON IS CLAIMED**

**Article by Iris**

Percy Jackson, age 12, has just recently been claimed at Camp Half Blood's weekly _Capture the Flag_ game stepping out of the creek after getting beat up and maimed by the Ares cabin. How did this happen? Our young demigod was on bored patrol, defending the flag against the red team when suddenly, A few people from the Ares cabin surrounded him.

Clarisse La Rue, one of the group told us "I had already suspected he was a son of Poseidon, who wouldn't after getting us all sprayed by toilet water and not getting wet himself with a dry circle on the spot he was standing?" She was obviously very angry with Jackson, having broken her electric spear, 'Maimer' (also called Lamer) after a dip in the river, mysteriously giving him more energy.

Percy Jackson is your average Demigod. ADHD. Dyslexia. Attacks from monsters. Even threatened in kindergarten! He was taking his afternoon nap when a snake slithered into his grasp. Nobody in the mortal world really knew what happened until his mother, Sally Jackson, found him playing with a stupendously long rope. (that's for you, Poseidon, being away while that happened.) _For more on Percy Jackson's history, please go to pg15._

**APHRODITE AND APOLLO: DO THEY HAVE A FLING?**

**Article by Hephaestus**

Aphrodite having cheated on me three millennia ago, with Ares, (that bastard) is she now cheating on him with APOLLO? There is suggestive evidence, on Apollo's bed, there is a pair of Aphrodite's shoes, am I correct, Apollo?

**So… ah… what do you think? I could delete it if you don't like it, this came from the top of my head. **


	2. Hiatus?

Hey guys! I KNOW I haven't written anything in a looong time. So, you'll find there's a poll on my profile, asking you which story I should be focusing on. Thanks!

Love,

Danielle


	3. Issue 2

Olympus Weekly – Issue 2

**News**

**Zeus's Lighting Bolt- FOUND!**

**By Zeus**

Hello all of you, this is Zeus, your ruler and powerful almighty father! I am to announce that my lighting bolt has been RETURNED! By none other than my brother's... son. (Who I WILL point out was not supposed to exist! EVER!) Percy Jackson is not killed, I regretfully, kindly, mercifully allowed him to live. And as for Miley Cyrus... MMM! I LOVE her new style of dressing! It... reveals so much more of her personality! Oh... uh... Hera's coming... Zeus OUT!

**Gossip **

**Is Athena really so resistant to boys?**

**By Aphrodite **

IS she? Reliable sources (me!) have told me NO. She isn't. But, when we asked the goddess (who is DREADFULLY in need of a makeover!) herself, she denied the rumor. "No, I can safely say that I CAN resist boys! Now GET OUT of my face Aphrodite!" Ru-ude! But, anyways... Until next time Olympus!

**Music and Entertainment**

**The OOGAs (Olympian Open Grand Awards)**

**By Apollo**

The OOGA awards were held last night gods! The 'Best STOP CHEATING ON ME song' award went to Hera who sang _Stop Cheating on Me _last night! Soo catchy! _Stop cheating on me/ stop cheating on me/ I don't care how sexy Miley Cyrus is now/ so stop cheating on me/ no you can't date anyone else but me/ don't even think of Lindsay Lohan/ so stop zeusey-poo cheating cheating cheating cheating cheating... on ME!_Ah, she definitely deserved that award! Now, for the 'Best Hottest Heartbreaking Actor', that one went to Zeus In the movies _Zeus the Heart breaker, The Woes of Hera, _and his latest movie _Ladies Man_! Ahh.. congrats you two! Now, the rest, you'll have to find out for yourself!

Now... say goodbye to the OOGAs Olympus! OOGA OOGA OOGA!

**Fashion and Beauty**

**Latest Trends as of Today – TOGAS AND CHITONS!**

**By Aphrodite**

Yep! Chitons! They're FANTASTIC! This trend hasn't changed for like... oh, the past to two thousand years... And as for mortal fashion... They're all wearing pants! Bo-ring! T-shirts? A trend? Bo-ring!

Now, back to Chitons, they now come in three more colors! Hot Pink, Hotter Pink, And Hottest Pink! Yeah! I have all three but, someone took two and replaced them with two more Hot pinks... I swaer! They look sooo alike! BEWARE the chiton burglar!

**Advice**

By Athena

**Dear Athena,**

**Help! I'm dealing with boy probs, I really like him and he seems to like me! But i'm too shy to ask him out, and he is too! What do I do?**

**-Too shy**

Athena's answer-

ARGH! Boy problems? You're better off NOT liking him! But if you really insist... ask him out yourself. Now, leave me ALONE!

**Dear Athena,**

**I've been wondering... what's the answer to 2+2?**

**-1+2=8**

Athena's answer-

I AM glad that your question is about academic matters but... it is also IDIOTIC! 2+2=4 and no, 1+2 does NOT equal 8! It's 3!

**Dear Athena,**

**I've been invited to join the hunt- I WANT to join, but I don't want to leave the rest of my friends behind! What do I do?**

**- Huntress?**

Athena's Answer-

FINALLY! An intelligent person! Well, I think you SHOULD join the hunt! Artemis is a good friend of mine, and as for the rest of your friends? Don't worry! Ask them to join with you! If they say no... fine. Join anyways. True friends stick with each other through thick and thin.

**War and Fighting**

By Ares

**Ares is not available- Zeus has sentenced him to live as a mortal for a year working in a mortal confectionery called Mc Donald's. It seems he's getting fatter. **


	4. Poll Closing

Hey guys!

It's Dani, I just wanted to tell you all that the poll will be closed on February 5th. So if you haven't voted yet, this is your chance.

Thanks for reading my stories, guys! It means a lot to me.

Love,

Danielle


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